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The Thoughts for October 2006

Here, you can browse my erratically updated blog. Just a head's up: there are times I manage to update this daily, and other times where I will somehow go months. If you're really obsessed with me, I recommend checking out my Twitter page, to which I post far more frequently. (You can see the latest five posts below.)

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October 26, 2006

"Mr. Mauthe, have there ever been any movies based off of books?"--one of my illustrious and brilliantly intelligent students this week

You missed me, right? Wow. I missed you too. We have so much to catch up on. Oh, no, you go first.

Uh huh? Really? And they arrested you for that? Well, is the owner of the meerkat pressing charges? I mean, it wasn't like you hurt it, right? Oh. Oh. Oh. Well, that does make sense. Are you required to pay them back for the missing blender and searchlights? Uh huh. Well, that does seem unreasonable, but then again, I can't imagine how his grandmother felt about the whole thing either.

Me? Oh, nothing nearly that exciting. My son Aidan turned a month old yesterday. Yep. Well, of course we took some pictures. They are over here. Not many, but a few, and they really show off how far he's coming along.

Sleeping? Well, it comes and goes with him. He was awfully fussy the first part of this week, but he seems to be doing a lot better now. We think it might have been some gas problems. Who knows with babies, right? Regardless, he seems much better now, which means we're better now, you know?

My last week off? Yeah, I wish. No, I've been back for two weeks now. Yeah, it's been going okay. Started the research paper, the studying of which led one of my beautiful and unique snowflakes to that brilliant quote I mentioned. Also working on Julius Caesar--you can imagine how they love that. But I like it, and I'm having fun, so that's what mostly matters. Got observed today by a principal, though. Huh? No, not because of that--goodness, no one even knows about that except for that one heartbroken sea turtle. No, it was just the usual observation thing. Fun times.

Anyways...what else you been up to? Oh...I'm so sorry. That's terrible. I guess I should have assumed as much--didn't I warn you not to play that recording? Things you find in the basements of secluded cabins never lead to any good.

No, I understand. Let's change the subject. I saw some good movies lately--you probably read about them on the movie log I keep. Good stuff. Oh, but I did want to share with you--you know that movie Borat I have been talking about so much? Well, they put a bunch of deleted scenes on the Internet, and they're mostly pretty great. There's one about cheese and one about a visit to the doctor (that one's probably one of my favorites), a border patrol encounter, a run-in with the law, a dinner prayer, and a brilliant visit to the dog pound that probably tops them all. Yeah, you should definitely check them out.

Hmm? No, I understand. I wouldn't want to tick off my cellmate either. I just heard unearthly voices coming over the baby monitor anyways. Maria says it's a piano toy that talks, but it kinda freaked me out, so I'll go check on him.

Yeah, you too. Okay then. We'll see you soon. Bye.

 

October 5, 2006

Over a week into baby life, and we are doing well. Aidan is growing quickly--according to our visit with the midwife today, he is already up to eleven pounds. Craziness. His sleep patterns are not too bad--he spends a lot of the day sleeping, waking up more and more often and for longer periods with each passing day. At night? Well, he does okay. He likes to sleep in bed with us--he is very clingy, and likes to be held as much as possible. It's a habit we hope to break sometime, but for now, it's okay. After all, he's barely a week old.

And Maria? Doing well. Each day she gets to feeling stronger and stronger. She still spends most of her time reclining on the couch, as per my demands--I worry about her, and it helps her relax. She and I work pretty well with Aidan, taking turns on everything--she mostly handles diaper changes during the day, and I wake up for them at night (I do help out with them during the day as well, when I can). Apart from that, she and I are just trying to survive--feed the baby, feed ourselves, and get used to this new life.

And I'm really digging it. Aidan is a sweet baby--he doesn't fuss too much, and when he does, it's not shrill, like many babies. He likes to be held, but honestly, it's hard to mind that too much. I've watched a lot of movies this week, most of them with my infant son sound asleep on my shoulder...and that's really cool. A strange feeling, but nice. (My wife questions whether films like Do the Right Thing are quite appropriate for him, with their language; I figure a) he's asleep, b) language isn't big with him now anyways, and c) better to start him off with great films than with garbage. That's why he watches The Daily Show with me, too!)

Anyways, in house, life is good. Outside of here? Well, I'll close today by letting Garrison Keillor's recent Chicago Tribune editorial speak for me...

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Congress' shameful retreat from American values
Published October 4, 2006

I would not send my college kid off for a semester abroad if I were you. Last week, we suspended human rights in America, and what goes around comes around. Ixnay habeas corpus.

The U.S. Senate, in all its splendor and majesty, decided that an "enemy combatant" is any non-citizen whom the president says is an enemy combatant, including your Korean greengrocer or your Swedish grandmother or your Czech au pair, and can be arrested and held for as long as authorities wish without any right of appeal to a court of law to examine the matter. If your college kid were to be arrested in Bangkok or Cairo, suspected of "crimes against the state" and held in prison, you'd assume that an American foreign service officer would be able to speak to your kid and arrange for a lawyer, but this may not be true anymore. Be forewarned.

The Senate also decided it's up to the president to decide whether it's OK to make these enemies stand naked in cold rooms for a couple of days in blinding light and be beaten by interrogators. This is now purely a bureaucratic matter: The plenipotentiary stamps the file "enemy combatants" and throws the poor schnooks into prison and at his leisure he tries them by any sort of kangaroo court he wishes to assemble and they have no right to see the evidence against them, and there is no appeal. This was passed by 65 senators and will now be signed by President Bush, put into effect, and in due course be thrown out by the courts.

It's good that Barry Goldwater is dead because this would have killed him. Go back to the Senate of 1964--Goldwater, Dirksen, Russell, McCarthy, Javits, Morse, Fulbright--and you won't find more than 10 votes for it.

None of the men and women who voted for this bill has any right to speak in public about the rule of law anymore, or to take a high moral view of the Third Reich, or to wax poetic about the American Ideal. Mark their names. Any institution of higher learning that grants honorary degrees to these people forfeits its honor. Alexander, Allard, Allen, Bennett, Bond, Brownback, Bunning, Burns, Burr, Carper, Chambliss, Coburn, Cochran, Coleman, Collins, Cornyn, Craig, Crapo, DeMint, DeWine, Dole, Domenici, Ensign, Enzi, Frist, Graham, Grassley, Gregg, Hagel, Hatch, Hutchison, Inhofe, Isakson, Johnson, Kyl, Landrieu, Lautenberg, Lieberman, Lott, Lugar, Martinez, McCain, McConnell, Menendez, Murkowski, Nelson of Florida, Nelson of Nebraska, Pryor, Roberts, Rockefeller, Salazar, Santorum, Sessions, Shelby, Smith, Specter, Stabenow, Stevens, Sununu, Talent, Thomas, Thune, Vitter, Voinovich, Warner.

To paraphrase Sir Walter Scott: Mark their names and mark them well. For them, no minstrel raptures swell. High though their titles, proud their name, boundless their wealth as wish can claim, these wretched figures shall go down to the vile dust from whence they sprung, unwept, unhonored and unsung.

Three Republican senators made a show of opposing the bill and after they'd collected all the praise they could get, they quickly folded. Why be a hero when you can be fairly sure that the court will dispose of this piece of garbage.

If, however, the court does not, then our country has taken a step toward totalitarianism. If the government can round up someone and never be required to explain why, then it's no longer the United States as you and I always understood it. Our enemies have succeeded beyond their wildest dreams. They have made us become like them.

I got some insight last week into who supports torture when I went down to Dallas to speak at Highland Park Methodist Church. It was spooky. I walked in, was met by two burly security men with walkie-talkies, and within 10 minutes was told by three people that this was the Bushes' church and that it would be better if I didn't talk about politics. I was there on a book tour for "Homegrown Democrat," but they thought it better if I didn't mention it. So I tried to make light of it: I told the audience, "I don't need to talk politics. I have no need even to be interested in politics--I'm a citizen, I have plenty of money and my grandsons are at least 12 years away from being eligible for military service." And the audience applauded! Those were their sentiments exactly. We've got ours, and who cares?

The Methodists of Dallas can be fairly sure that none of them will be snatched off the streets, flown to Guantanamo Bay, stripped naked, forced to stand for 48 hours in a freezing room with deafening noise. So why should they worry? It's only the Jews who are in danger, and the homosexuals and gypsies. The Christians are doing fine. If you can't trust a Methodist with absolute power to arrest people and not have to say why, then whom can you trust?

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page updated:
November 8, 2006