August 30, 2005

I got an e-mail this morning from my good friend Ryan, who made the point that I really need to look at the fight story as awesome, lest I become one of those burnt-out angry teachers that everyone hates. And, I thought, did I really come across that irritable? So I re-read it.

Wow. I really did. So let me amend my earlier statement with this postscript:

Last night, I was seriously just worn out. The day had been fairly draining, and not really the way I wanted a Monday to go. That being said, the actual fight was upsetting more from a context point of view than it actually happening. It's fairly intimidating for a new teacher to have a fight break out, since you have to think, "do the principals think that this is my fault? Am I in trouble over this?" and so forth. So I was mainly upset because I felt like the whole thing reflected badly on me...not to mention that it was just draining--between the adrenalin rush and the feeling of loss of control of my class, I just felt a bit adrift.

But the fight itself...it was too surreal to really be upsetting. It was more of a "well, SHIT, I didn't expect THAT!" than anything. At TLC, the kids were already in too much trouble to get into a real fight...they would get to posing at each other, and then wait to be "saved" by a teacher pulling them out, so they could save face. But D didn't do that, and I have to say, I was a bit surprised. Add into that little me trying to stop big her...and, you know, it's all just a bit weird.

But I'm less angry than I seemed yesterday. If it hadn't been for everything else going on yesterday, I wouldn't have been so bothered. It's just that, with everything else going on, my mood was a bit grim yesterday. I'm much better today (it doesn't hurt that I slept in and got some rest).

Anyways, that all being said, I'm off to get some lunch with my wife and then watch some movies. Have a good hurricane-free day...

EDIT:

Earlier today, I checked my friend Ben's website. He made the following comment, apparently based on my report of a fight:

"By the way, congrats to Josh on his new job with the Junior WWE. Hope you continue to survive your work."

That comment made me laugh, and inspired the following, which will probably only be funny to me. So be it.

-------------------

GOOD OL' JR: Folks, we're back here on Junior WWE RAW, and let me tell you, this night has been electric so far, and we're just getting started!

HOWLER MONKEY: I sure hope we get to see some boobies before too long!

JR: Well, Monkey, it looks like you may just get your wish, because out in the ring is TENACIOUS D. She's got a mic, and she looks pissed...

TD: YO, YO, YO, YO, YO! Y'all listen up, homies. I only been up in this place for about a week, and it looks like I done made myself all sorts of enemies so far. Hell, that's all right by me--they just folks incapable of understanding that I'm the real [bleeped] deal!

CROWD: Huh?

TD: But, yo, peep this action: for roun'bout the last week, I been hearing all sorts of nonsense out of DA Armstrong's mouth--she been saying that I ain't nothing, that I need to get myself on out of here...hell, she must be thinking she's all kinds of real, but let me tell y'all sumpin--I. IS. REAL. And real recognizes real, and I ain't recognizin' her, you know what I'm sayin?

CROWD: No. No, we don't. Have you ever actually met a black person before, or have you gotten all your speech from MTV?

TD: So, DA, you want some--COME GET SOME!

JR: By God, Monkey, Tenacious D is calling out DA Armstrong! This could get real ugly, real quick.

[DA's music--t.a.t.u.'s "All the Things She Said"--cues up, and the pyro explodes. Out comes DA.]

DA: Jesus Christ. Who are you? What are you doing here? Could you ever just shut up?

CROWD: YAY!

TD: Yo, yo, yo, YO! Who you talking to, playa? You got NOTHING! You ain't gonna do nothing, cause that's all you is--NOTHIN!

DA: What?

Crowd: What?

Stone Cold Val Venis: What?

TD: That's right! I mean...good god, this writing sucks. Why do I have to be a wannabe black girl? I just want to go back to school...

--TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES--

Vince McMahon: --it right, or your ass is FIRED!

TD: So, like I was sayin, GET YO ASS DOWN HERE FOR A GRADE A 8 MILE ASS WHOOPIN!

DA: This sucks. I'm leaving.

[DA turns around to go. Tenacious D attacks while her back is turned. The crowd goes mild.]

HM: Here we go!

JR: Tenacious D has unleashed a cheap shot while DA's back was turned! Folks, this is getting ugly. These girls are pulling hair, throwing punches--this ain't wrestling, folks, this is a Pier Six BRAWL!

HM: Maybe they'll pull each other's shirts off! PUPPIES! OMG BOOBS~~~!

[JR grabs Monkey's head and slams it into the announcer desk repeatedly.]

JR: Thank God. 5 minutes of quiet. Did he really just say "OMG"?

HM: :-(

JR: AHH! Jesus, quit that!

Offscreen producer [whispering]: GUYS! There's a match going on...

JR: Tenacious D has got DA by the hair and is swinging her around! This isn't right--BY GAWD, THAT GIRL HAS A FAMILY! SOMEONE GET DOWN HERE AND STOP THIS!

[Referee Josh Mauthe and GM Jason Franklin come running down to the ring and separate the girls.]

JR: Folks, these two just can't stand each other, and it's starting to really heat up. But later tonight: Referee Josh Mauthe in a Bra and Panties match!

Monkey: AAAAH!

JR: Serves you right for always wanting those things.

[ads]

JR: Folks, we're back LIVE from Wilson County, where WCHS Champion Tenacious D and DA Armstrong have been escorted from the arena. We now take you live, to our own Todd Bowman, who is standing by to interview CGI, DA's tag team partner.

TB: Why do I have to do interviews like this? My only part is to stand here until I get beaten up by people.

CGI: SHUT UP! You'll give it away!

TB: No one watches this anyways. Anyone still reading this column needs a life, or is just reading it to make fun of Josh later.

CGI: Speaking of which, how hot will he look in that Bra and Panties match later?

TB: AAAAH! [Todd Bowman drives the microphone into his brain in an effort to rid his mind of that image. He collapses to the floor, smiling at the sweet release of death. Todd Bowman has fallen.]

CGI: Hmm. Now what? Well, I like cookies...

[Tenacious D enters, screaming and wielding a steel...um...desk.]

TD: Your friend don't want some, YOU'LL get some!

CGI: What? What in the hell are you--hey, is that a desk? That doesn't even make sense! How could you hit someone with a desk? It's just too heavy!

JR: Tenacious D is armed and going after CG! She's gonna kill that poor woman!

Walter [waving his arms around and chanting in a sing-song voice]: They're gonna kill that poor woman!

[Referee Josh Mauthe enters and bodyslams Tenacious D through a wall. He picks her up, spins her over his head, and F5s her through another desk.]

JR: Oh, you did not. You're too small to do that.

JM: Shut up. I'm writing this. I can be big and powerful if I feel like it.

JR: Yeah, but no one will believe it. They all know you.

[The Howler Monkey suddenly develops rabies, AIDS, and Ebola. He pounces up and eats JR's face.]

JR: AAAH!

JM: When it's your story, you tell it your way. Till then, shut up. Serves you right.

----------------------

Having spent way too much time on something that will only entertain me, I'm outta here.

August 29, 2005

Ugh. What a day.

I started off the day already in the hole, because I'm concerned about my extended family. My dad's whole family lives in New Orleans, while most of my mom's lives in Lafayette, Louisiana. Now, the New Orleans folks had already evacuated, but that still didn't answer the question of what would happen to their houses...so that's been a bit of stress all day. (I still don't know anything, as no one can really get into New Orleans yet. I know the family is all fine--the New Orleans people evacuated, and the Lafayette people got nothing at all. I'm hoping that the slight eastern movement of the storm, as well as the little weakening that hit it before it hit land, will combine to make everything as good as possible. I guess we'll see...)

Then I get up. I'm already tired, because I didn't get much sleep this weekend. (I got woken up eary on Saturday by Gabby at eight, since she was up and ready to play. Sunday, my dad woke me up to let me know about the family evacuating and all...not so bad, if we hadn't been in Shelbyville at the Walking Horse Celebration until past midnight...) Making things worse: my eyes are killing me--my left eye is pretty much pure red. So, no contacts for the day. And Josh no likey wearing glasses.

So I get to work, and the day is...well, it's a day. I spill my water all over myself and my desk before first block. But, I figure as first block starts, at least the day is going, and there's nothing else to come...

Josh's First Block
a story by Josh

The background:
About a week back, I had a new girl start in my first block class. We'll call her "D". D came from MAP Academy--the school for troubled/violent/whatever kids in Wilson county. She had just returned, and was not all that happy to be back in regular school.

Now, already in my first block was a girl we'll call "A". A is a sweet girl. I haven't had problem one out of her since the year started. She's a little chatty sometimes, but works hard and does her best.

For whatever reason, these two have not liked each other since D entered the class last week. There has been little outward aggression, but some snippy comments have been made, as well as some asides in journal entries (A making comments about how she hates girls "like that one sitting in the front row over there). Nothing harmful, just snippiness...until this morning.

The original incident:
Class was going as usual. There was some chatter. We were wrapping up some work on vocabulary words, and getting ready to start reading a new story ("The Masque of the Red Death").

Then, with no warning whatsoever, D started yelling at A, asking what she was looking at. A snapped back, and they started to argue. I attempted to quiet the discussion, but D got up and walked across the room, telling A that "you won't do nothing". A rose, as I hurried over to separate them. Before I got there, they were fighting--pulling hair, hitting, kicking, the whole nine yars. I ordered S (one of my best students) to run down to Mr. Franklin's office (the assistant principal, the man in charge of discipline, and the closest administrator) as I attempted to pull D off of A, which I was not all that successful at for any worthwhile length of time, given that 1) D was much bigger than me, and 2) as I pulled D back, A would leap back intor the fray. As I tried, two of A's friends stepped in and attempted to help me separate the two, but by that point, Mr. Franklin arrived and escorted D, and then A, out of the room.

Fun.

But wait, there's more!

The second part:
Class had gotten back on track. We had started reading the story, we were having a discussion, and we were wrapping up for the last few minutes--putting up journals, turning in work, etc. With no warning, D re-entered the room and ran across to C (A's friend), screaming "you think something is funny too?". I was close this time, having been putting journals on the shelf, and since C wanted nothing to do with the fight, I could pretty easily grab D from behind, in an effort to restrain her. I drug her most of the way back across the classroom, with her kicking over desks and screaming for me to "get the fuck off of her" or "let me go right this second". I had her about halfway/two-thirds across the room when Mr. Franklin entered, and grabbed her with an arm around her neck. I remained where I was, holding onto the arms, until I felt that Mr. Franklin had her under control. He (and Ms. Breedwell (the other assistant principal), who had entered by this point) asked D to calm down. She continued to scream that "you better let the fuck go of my neck", "I hate this fucking school", etc. After a few moments, during which she made no effort to calm down/come peacefully, Officer Moore (our school's security officer, who is literally 6'10) entered, and Mr. Franklin said "Arrest her and get her out of here". Officer Moore grabbed D roughly, pulled her around like she was made of cotton candy, and escorted her from the room.

More fun.

The aftermath:

• A got a five day suspension for being in a fight. Given the circumstances, she will be allowed to make up her work, something not normally done.
• D was no calmer after leaving. It ended up taking three officers to load her in a car. She, from what I hear, was taken to a mental institution for some evaluations.
• My day got better--or, at least, no worse.
• All day, my students asked me about the fight. It got around school awfully quickly.

So, yeah. That's my story.

The upshot of all this? Because of the hurricane (now tropical storm) coming through Nashville, I get tomorrow off of work!

To that, I say: THANK GOD.

August 25, 2005

Stayed home from work today, as I'm feeling fairly crappy. Sore throat, headache, queasiness...all sorts of fun. Hopefully a day of rest and relaxation will help the immune system kick in, because I really can't afford to miss tomorrow. The first draft of my student's reviews are due, and I have to spend this weekend working on them if I don't want to push back the due date (and I don't).

Not much going on. I've been greatly enjoying the Pat Robertson debacle...you know he's a graduate of my high school, right? Lord, what a douchebag. I thought it couldn't get any better than a religous leader calling for the murder of someone...but, somehow, his backpedaling is even funnier. From the IMDb:

Televangelist Pat Robertson on Wednesday charged that the media had "misinterpreted" his televised remarks about Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez. Appearing on his 700 Club show, which airs on Disney's ABC Family channel, Robertson denied that he had called for Chavez's assassination. "I said our special forces could take him out," Robertson said. "'Take him out' could be a number of things including kidnapping. There are a number of ways of taking out a dictator from power besides killing him. I was misinterpreted." However, a transcript of Robertson's earlier remarks indicates that he had used no such language. "If he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it. It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war," he had declared.

How awesome is that? I don't know if I like his blatant lying about not saying anything about assasination more, or his attempt to say that "When I said 'take him out', I meant...um...to dinner or something! Yes, that's right...I meant that he should be taken out for a nice meal." Brilliant stuff. I wonder how his audience enjoys having their intelligence insulted like that.

Otherwise, little to say today. Probably going to go watch another movie while laying on the couch and dying. Or something like that. Already watched one (the great Roman Holiday), and am liking the idea of seeing something else. Anyways, have a good day.

August 21, 2005

You know, the fact that I get 4-5 hits a day on this page makes me wish that I had more exciting stuff to post about. Still, there's only so many times you can post "I taught kids today. It was okay." without it getting a little old.

Decent week, I guess. Frustrated by the cancelled Green Day concert Monday night; one of the band members got sick. Its been re-scheduled (as of this morning) for Sunday, October 16th. So it's a ways off, which is a bit of a bummer...still, better to have it late than not at all, I guess.

The rest of the week and weekend have been pretty standard fare. A lot of teaching, a lot of house stuff, but nothing terribly interesting. Finished watching Firefly, which I enjoyed greatly; got to see Adam, when he and Jim's trip fell apart; saw The Devil's Rejects this past weekend, which I liked pretty well, even admitting that it had some major flaws; am simultaneously looking forward to and sad about the finale of Six Feet Under tonight: it promises to be a good episode, but I hate to see one of my favorite shows go off the air.

Otherwise, little of interest going on. Sorry about that.

I did want to share, in closing, this wonderful line from my wife, taken from our car ride to the Wilson County Fair (and that's all the context you really need for this):

Maria: "But QVC is quality!"

August 10, 2005

Okay, okay. I'm now a week and a half into my new career as tenth grade English teacher...and yet, I still haven't done a real update. Goodness...how sadly I'm neglecting the page. Ah, well...my two or three loyal readers have been waiting long enough. (Honestly, if you've been checking every day for an update...well, I would apologize, but first I would laugh at you for having no life. I mean, seriously...if you're hanging on the every word of a new teacher, well...)

So, anyways. The biggest reason that it's taken so long to update is that (and this may or may not shock you) it's FRIGGIN TOUGH being a teacher...particularly a new one. Much as I was when I first started at TLC, I'm completely inundated with massive amounts of work. To be fair, I have a much lighter load than many of those around me...everyone teaches three periods a day, but few have the good fortune to only teach one class for all of those periods, thus greatly reducing the number of lesson plans you have to do. So life could be much worse...I could be teaching three classes, or have a class in the cafeteria. (And let's not even get into the poor French teacher and Social Studies teacher who got hired on and then thrown a ninth grade Honors English class.)

But, even while I recognize my somewhat good luck, I'm still seriously busy, and pretty damn worn out by the end of the day. I tend to come home and just veg out on the computer for a little while (something I enjoy much more since our weekend purchase of an extra 256 MB of RAM for the computer this weekend, making everything run much more smoothly and quickly, thankfully), or try and catch up on some TV.

(A side note on that: Maria and I finally got to catch up on Six Feet Under this weekend. And, although we're already behind again, it was a really great set of episodes we watched, culminating in what would have been suprising if it hadn't been ruined for me...and yet, it was still a good, even sadly moving little episode. I'm really eager to watch this week's, and see the aftermath, which I think will be even better. While I'm very sad about this show coming to an end, as much as I love it, I'm greatly enjoying the ride there.)

(A secondary note, on the subject of TV: this weekend, I actually found the entire series of Firefly for 30 bucks at Phonoluxe. Naturally, I picked it up, and have watched about half of the series, and I'm really loving it. I told you it was good, but as I watch episodes I had not seen, I'm even more impressed than I was. It's marvelous to watch something so willing to mix genres (sci-fi and the western), write strong characters, have genuinely hilarious dialogue, and not be afraid to throw emotion into the mix. Really good stuff.)

So what is the daily grind of a teacher like? Pretty average. My schedule consists of two hour-and-a-half classes, followed by a planning period (technically, since I have third block planning, it's a two hour period off, but the downside is that I have to spend thirty minutes watching the lunchroom. So while every other teacher gets a planning period plus a thirty minute lunch break, I only get the planning period, during which I have to work in my lunch. Still, free food from the cafeteria kind of makes up for it...and it's better food than I would expect!), and finally a fourth period class to round out the day. Between each class, I roll my little cart (being new, I don't have my own room) from class to class, only having to use the elevator when coming from my first period class.

It's not too bad a day, all in all. The 1.5 hour classes go by pretty quickly, and it's nice to only have three classes to teach a day, even if you are spending a typical amount of time teaching each day. The other teachers seem nice enough, although there are enough that I don't even come close to knowing everyone yet. And the rules of the school...ugh. I'm quite baffled, but am successfully bluffing my way through for the most part.

And the classes? Well, it depends which ones you're asking about. My first two are great. My first is more quiet, but warming up to me, and they work well. My second is definitely more talkative, but they work hard, and we get along very well. (I was written this strange post it note today, which is now affixed to my name badge; I get it, but am saddened by the closing Gwen Stefani lyrics.)As for my fourth...well, we're still butting heads. Today they had some seriously unpleasant rules handed down, with some major consequences; we'll see if that helps. (They're not bad, just talkative to the point where I can't teach, and I'm not putting up with that. I can handle chit-chat, but not to this level, and it's not lasting. So we'll see what happens there...)

Otherwise, it's just routine. I'm enjoying it so far, though...although Monday's student protest of the dress code was a bit of a strange day. The Wilson County School Board has come up with a dress code, and the big problem is...well, it all depends on who you ask. Some feel it's too strict; some just don't like the idea...but to most, it seems that the problem is the nitpickiness, the sheer bizarre distinctions that are being made. Of the various complaints, it's this last one that I think has the most relevance, but that's neither here nor there...although, if you're curious as to what all the fuss is about, you can click here to see the dress code.

The point, though, is that Monday, a good number of students sat outside the school, surrounded by every Nashville news station, in an effort to protest the dress code. (However, one of the students who did come to class was willing to bet that only about 30% of those outside actually cared about the dress code; the other 70 were just looking for a reason to skip school...) It was an interesting day, and has led to all sorts of harassment by the media and by irritable parents. Things seem to have calmed down for now, but I hate to count on that...

Anyways, that's life here. Lots of routine, lots of stress as I try to find my bearings...but overall, I'm really enjoying the job. Could use a little more sleep, but otherwise okay.

Apart from the job, you would be surprised as to how little is going on. Maria has begun the process of trying to redecorate; over the last couple of nights, she's been using that tear-and-stick wallpaper to cover up the ugly paint pattern in the hallway. It looks pretty great, actually...I'll try and get pictures when it's done (something which will hopefully happen later tonight).

Okay; I'm officially out of things to say. (I was thinking about ranting about Bush's passing of a highway bill which was 2 billion dollars over the absolute deadline he set as the veto point...but I've decided to save that for some other day. Or, I'll hope that Ben gets it for me. He'll do a better job than me anyways. He has news stories and all sorts of good stuff...where I just pull it out of my butt. So hopefully he comes through for us.) Have a good one...and I think I'll leave you all with this image of Gabby, who decided to take baby Alex's pacifier from her and use it herself. No, Maria's hand is not holding it in; just holding her to face the camera. So there's a nugget of joy for you, and I'm outta here...have a good one...

EDIT: Sadly, it seems that Matthew McGrory, who I met at the Lone Wolf Horror Convention, died today. He was a young guy--only 32--but I would imagine that his massive size led to health problems. He died of natural causes on the set of his new movie, in which he was playing Andre the Giant (!) in a biopic of the wrestler. If you're curious, here's the story; more to the point, here and here are the two best pictures I could get of him.

August 2, 2005

Yes, it's been a busy week; yes, I'm into my first week of school now. Big time excitement. However, this is just a short update...with my stress level and all sorts of things going on, I just wanted to take a minute to update a few little things, but save the detailed recap for later.

• Item the first, which no one will care about but me: I spent tonight designing a so-called "favorite icon" for this page. Favorite icons are the fancy little icons you see in your address bar on certain pages, or in your favorites listing. If you're using IE, you may not be able to see it on mine, which is fine; if you're using Firefox (which I started using this week, and deeply love and will not go back to IE ever again...although the fact that my site didn't look right in Firefox and I had to change a ton of stuff was irritating to me), it should show up there just fine. So, yeah...like I said, doubtful anyone will care...but I'm proud of myself.
  
  
• Item the second: remember how irritated I was over having Harry Potter spoiled for me? Well, what have I done to tick people off, since now I've had the latest episode of Six Feet Under spoiled too?
  
  See, Maria and I love the show, but what with the new job and all, we're running a couple of weeks behind...which stinks, because it's the final season, and we're enjoying it, plus we knew that something big was coming around the ninth episode. Which apparently aired Sunday, since when I signed on last night, written in the headlines of the entertainment section of my sign on screen is the surprise from last night's episode. Grrrrrrrrrr...
  
  On the one hand, I'm more irritated by the Potter thing, since they knew people hadn't read the book yet; on the other, wasn't there better entertainment news to talk about? Like Tom Cruise or something? Sigh...
  
  
• I don't want to end on a sour note, so I will say that my first week of teaching has been...well, interesting. I'm definitely stressed out, but more from planning than the actual kids, who are mostly pretty good kids. A bit chatty, but otherwise okay. (Can I mention the fact that I have a kid whose last name is Chlebowski brings me a spot of joy on a daily basis?)
  
  It's definitely a different world in public school...a lot of paperwork, a lot of routine. I'm getting the hang of it, but only bit by bit. My stress level is through the roof, and I'm sure my moods are crazy...if you get a chance, offer Maria your sympathy when you talk to her for having to put up with me. (With no time to go to the movies, watch my shows, or read anything, I'm a little tense.)
  
  
• Speaking of TV, the last thing for tonight: Friday nights, on Sci-Fi channel, the brilliant, entertaining, and wonderful show Firefly is running. Seriously...if you're not watching it, you're missing a blast of a show. Really well done...and the more I see about the movie version entitled Serenity (check out the trailer here), the more excited I am. So check it out...or at least go rent the DVDs!

On that, I'm out--have a good one, and I'll have more details later this week if I can...